The chicken

Nanti-SARRMM · Post by **Nanti-SARRMM** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 8:45 am

All I have to say is that this is hilarious.

the lines that made me laugh the most were from Ralph Nader, Jerry Falwell, Ernest Hemingway, Saddam Hussein and Sigmund Frued. The Bible answer is awesome too. I think Hussein's and Falwell's made me laugh the most.

Kudos to habiba.

Nanti-SARRMM · Post by **Nanti-SARRMM** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 1:52 pm

Others I thought of:

Osama Bin Laden: The chicken is a symbol of the oppressive western society and by crossing the road, violates the holy precept of Islam. A holy jihad is declared against the chicken as suicide bombers blow up cars trying to kill the chicken.

Barak Obama: The chicken has always crossed the road, we are now at point in history where the politics of chickens crossing the roads need to change for the betterment of society, because the chicken accepts donations from the very interests who built the road the chicken crosses.

Ahmadinejad: The chicken never crossed the road, despite what others attest to. I also hate the chicken and secretly build nuclear facilities to eradicate the chicken out of existence.

SWKT Parachuter: I constantly point out to the chicken how stupid it is to cross the road while the chicken crosses the road and make fun of every little mistake the chicken may make, make fun of his reasoning to do so and suggests, as if the chicken hadn't thought of it before, that it could use it wings to fly over the road.

Hobbes: The chicken is actually a secret member of the Death Squad, throwing the world into havoc by crossing the road, enabling me to destroy civilization behind the backs of those who ponder on the meaning of the chicken crossing the road.

Florence Nightengale: I notice an injured chicken attempting to cross the road and dedicate the rest of my life to helping unfortunate chickens injured crossing the road.

China: We teach the chicken that crossing the road is the best and only option, and if any opinion or news leak attempts to prove contrary, we isolate the chicken to prevent it from being distracted by enemy propaganda.

Hillary Clinton: I associate myself with all female chickens, becoming their hope and inspiration for a better America because I have the most experience crossing the road with chickens, and because chickens do cross the road, they in turn support me in my bid to become the first woman president of the United States. I will also force them to accept governmental health care so all chickens have health insurance as they cross the road.

Martin Luther: I notice in my bible reading that the current mode to cross the road, as sanctioned by the church, is incorrect. I put up a notice by the sign of the road, attempting to reform how the chicken crosses the road but in turn a new religion is created to cross the road differently

yellow m&m · Post by **yellow m&m** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 2:50 pm

One word: amazing.

Werf_Must · Post by **Werf_Must** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 2:58 pm

My two cents (feel free to disagree...)

the librarian: Check the archives, the answer lies there.

Claudio and Foreman: We can perform a complicated pseudo-scientific evaluation to figure it out!

Double White Lines: The chicken crossed me! Werf won't get away with it again!

Niffler: Well, in Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, there is a fitting allusion to the chicken crossing when Harry experiments with the dark spells that are his book. So obviously, this is the chicken's way of expressing need for the extraordinary.

Nanti-SARRMM · Post by **Nanti-SARRMM** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:01 pm

Three Wise Men: The chicken crossing the road is a sign that a new king is born. We travel in search of the king, losing sight of the chicken. We ask directions of Herod, who failed to notice the chicken at all but is told by his bird watching wise men of the general area of where the king can be found in relation to the chicken. We soon see the chicken crossing the road and follow it to pay homage to the new born king. Herod then gets mad because we are advised to cross a different road to get home.

FDR: All we have to fear is the fear of chickens crossing the road.

Claudio and Foreman, alternative: There are many songs that deal with the chicken crossing the road, we list most of them and our opinions of the songs.

The Modern Chicken: I cross the road. Later I blog about my experiences crossing the road, with scores of people who submit questions asking why I crossed the road. I refuse to answer because even I do not know.

Honor Code office: The Chicken crosses the road and someone reports it for breaking the honor code because the chicken did not cross at the cross walk, and obeying the law is part of the honor code. We launch a full scale investigation as to whether the chicken broke the honor code and call it in to the honor code office to report the accusations with the utmost seriousness, no matter how silly any of the accusations may be.

Werf_Must · Post by **Werf_Must** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:17 pm

Nephi: As we journeyed in the wilderness, the chicken crossed the road to flee from the destruction of Jerusalem. My brethren murmured much, being great in hunger and desiring to feast upon the bird.

(The author of There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly):
...which crossed the road to distract the snake from eating the mouse which wiggled and jiggled down the street..."

Speaking of Hitler (in Nanti's post) I was watching a Larry King Live show the other night when it had Joy from The View on it. Her quote (talking about having political candidates on their show and how it is good PR for them) "'The View' softens everyone up. We can soften, you know, Hitler up if he comes on 'The View'. "

Darth Fedora · Post by **Darth Fedora** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:23 pm

As a person of Jewish heritage with family members who died in concentration camps, I really didn't find your "joke" about Hitler funny. I'm certainly not saying we should gloss over the Holocaust, but including it in a list of chicken jokes is really tasteless and hurtful.