(link.)
Dear trying to help,
I believe there is quite a bit of pressure on us students (particularly at BYU) to have a perfect life plan including a major and career that we enjoy, that will make a lot of money, that will prepare us to be parents, or combinations of these and other factors. Compounding this pressure is the idea that if we pray hard enough and long enough, each of us will receive any amount of knowledge on this subject from the Holy Spirit.
I’m glad that you have been blessed with clear guidance from God about what you need to study and the specific skills you need to develop. I hope that you can see how beneficial that can be in your life. I’m sure that when you have thought about your own plans for your career you have felt at least some of the social pressure and expectations from others that I have described.
I would suggest that your roommate probably also feels pressured, and he’s probably more frustrated than you know about the fact that his current major isn’t a good fit. If he’s anything like me, he’s been thoughtfully considering it, and it will take him some time to develop a clearer idea of the direction that he wants to take in his life.
If he reaches out to you and asks for your advice, I would recommend limiting your own judgment of his situation and allowing him opportunities to consider and explore his own interests, strengths, and skills. The writers have given some good advice on how to help him do that.
I want to emphasize that in the end, your roommate has to make these decisions for himself. I don’t believe there is only one possible career path that could bring him enjoyment and fulfillment. He can find one that works for him. It would certainly be a good idea for him to consider his choices prayerfully and to seek guidance from the Spirit and from the scriptures. If he wants your help, counsel him to do those things. Please support your friend’s choices as far as he feels they can bless his own life.
(This is just to say that if it were me, I would give the guy some space and let him come to his own conclusions. You're not better than him just because you've had your life plan figured out since you were five.)
picking your roommate's major
Moderator: Marduk
Re: picking your roommate's major
Is that on men? I never felt that much pressure around my major tbh
Re: picking your roommate's major
Oh, I felt a lot of pressure about my major. It felt like a Very Big Decision that would determine my Future. Which is true in some ways, but also not true in other ways. I agree with the writers who suggested talking it out with a professor or advisor in the major the person is a little interested in. And with larry_wayne and you can't force someone down a path and trying to do so makes things harder for everyone.
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Re: picking your roommate's major
Taking the career placement test in the Wilk was very helpful for me - it told me possible careers I would be good at and gave me a list of careers to stay away from. If I were this person's roommate I would lure them into taking the 16 personalities test - it's crazy insightful about why certain careers are a good or bad fit based on your personality. I say meddle if you can do so unobtrusively.
Re: picking your roommate's major
Yeah I think my life has had too many spreadsheets thus far and avoiding med school was the right choice (got to go to an Instacare after an ex flung himself onto gravel longboarding haha -- the worst)Genuine Article wrote:Taking the career placement test in the Wilk was very helpful for me - it told me possible careers I would be good at and gave me a list of careers to stay away from. If I were this person's roommate I would lure them into taking the 16 personalities test - it's crazy insightful about why certain careers are a good or bad fit based on your personality. I say meddle if you can do so unobtrusively.
Re: picking your roommate's major
I didn't have trouble picking my major(s) (aside from the fact that I added the second one when I was a senior), but I picked my minor by going through the undergraduate course catalog and crossing off all of the things I wasn't interested in. (Prior to declaring my second major, I was required to have a minor, so there was some degree of pressure, although not as much as for choosing a major.)