Facebook status

[melbabi]

Since it is around finals times I have been noticing something regarding facebook. Most of my friends in school, I'd say about 75% of them, seem to lament about their finals/school/studies and so on. Maybe I'm just taking it wrong. But when people say things like, 'Ugh, I have a final, a 10 page paper, and a presentation due this week,' I tend to wonder what their intentions for posting that was. Are they trying to elicit sympathy? Maybe impress everyone with how much they're doing? I guess I'm confused as to why people would feel the need to complain on facebook, which can be impersonal and others cannot always tell the tone that is implied. Obviously I'm not perfect and have done my fair share of facebook complaining in the past so I'm not trying to condemn anyone who does that. More than anything I guess I just get annoyed with people who constantly complain, especially my friends who are getting their master's/ph.d's because I tend to think when they complain about how, 'hard grad school is,' I wonder why, if it is so difficult for them that they feel the need to complain in every facebook post, are they continuing with it? I have solved this issue by blocking them but I still wonder what they're intentions may be. Any thoughts?? Does this bother anyone else?? And yes, I do see the irony of me complaining about others on a public forum as well...

[ahem.]

My guess? Procrastination. If they have so much to do, they are probably on Facebook in an attempt to escape for a few minutes. And what is most prominently on their minds in those moments? All the stuff they should be doing and feel guilty for avoiding. It doesn't surprise me that it seeps into statuses.

[Dead Cat]

I see it as more of a "hey, I'm going to be very busy, so don't get mad if I ignore you for a few hours or days, and while you're at it, either stay away or help me if you can." Also, being pessimistic is a lot easier than being optimistic when speaking your mind.

[UnluckyStuntman]

I personally find complaining on facebook to be cathartic, especially when my fellow grad students are sharing the same frustration/struggle with an assignment. Granted, if all the person ever does is complain about schoolwork (or life in general), then it gets old, but I don't see the harm in it, especially right before finals.

[thebigcheese]

Well, my statuses are usually related to one of the following things:

1) Something funny.
2) What I've done recently, am currently doing, or will soon be doing.
3) Stuff I'm thinking about.

School complaints could fit within two or more of those categories. I doubt that most people are intentionally trying to beg for sympathy. If someone happens to offer sympathy, then cool...but they're not fishing for it. They're just saying exactly what they're thinking about: "Man, school is hard." or "Holy cow, I have to finish 7 papers by the end of this week!!!!!!!"

[Katya]

I personally find complaining on facebook to be cathartic, especially when my fellow grad students are sharing the same frustration/struggle with an assignment.

Agreed. I think it's a way to let off steam. Do you (Melbabi) want them to post happier things? Or just post things that reflect their whole range of moods, instead of always posting when they're frustrated?

[melbabi]

I personally find complaining on facebook to be cathartic, especially when my fellow grad students are sharing the same frustration/struggle with an assignment.

Agreed. I think it's a way to let off steam. Do you (Melbabi) want them to post happier things? Or just post things that reflect their whole range of moods, instead of always posting when they're frustrated?

I mainly just mean those who are constantly complaining frustrate me. So yes, I would like to know their whole range of moods. I would like to know that these people do actually have good things going on in their life because their status' don't indicate that.

[thebigcheese]

It's true, some people have a habit of being pessimistic about everything. Personally, I try to make a conscientious effort to put some variety in my statuses, but I know that not everyone is like that. A lot of people probably don't even think about how their status is received by others, or they don't care.

[Wisteria]

I gotta say, since this is a soapbox, I really dislike it when my friends' posts all have to do with annoyances with their spouse, even if it's something small. It really makes me uncomfortable to see things like that broadcast in such a public way even though I'm sure most of my friends would be surprised to realize that- and it's only a handful of them that do it. But it feels awkward to me.

[Dragon Lady]

I gotta say, since this is a soapbox, I really dislike it when my friends' posts all have to do with annoyances with their spouse, even if it's something small. It really makes me uncomfortable to see things like that broadcast in such a public way even though I'm sure most of my friends would be surprised to realize that- and it's only a handful of them that do it. But it feels awkward to me.

I don't have that problem and I'm grateful. It'd bug me to no end. People shouldn't vent about their spouses to others, especially not on a public forum.

[NerdGirl]

I gotta say, since this is a soapbox, I really dislike it when my friends' posts all have to do with annoyances with their spouse, even if it's something small. It really makes me uncomfortable to see things like that broadcast in such a public way even though I'm sure most of my friends would be surprised to realize that- and it's only a handful of them that do it. But it feels awkward to me.

Oh my gosh, this! I have a friend who posts between 5 and 10 complaints a day about her husband on facebook. Some days I go on and my newsfeed is just full of posts about how her husband stunk up the bathroom and left a dirty fork on the couch and hung up his shirts facing the wrong direction. I just have to wonder if she really realizes that hundreds of people, including her husband, are seeing this, and what he thinks about it.

[thebigcheese]

People seriously do that? Wow...

[TheAnswerIs42]

That is absolutely terrible! I am a firm believer that the only person you should complain to about your spouse is your spouse. If you complain to family or friends, they will remember the bad things long after you have come to a compromise and worked things out. But on Facebook? That is a new low.

[Dragon Lady]

That is absolutely terrible! I am a firm believer that the only person you should complain to about your spouse is your spouse. If you complain to family or friends, they will remember the bad things long after you have come to a compromise and worked things out. But on Facebook? That is a new low.

Amen. Agreed. Amen. Times 3.

[Katya]

I gotta say, since this is a soapbox, I really dislike it when my friends' posts all have to do with annoyances with their spouse, even if it's something small. It really makes me uncomfortable to see things like that broadcast in such a public way even though I'm sure most of my friends would be surprised to realize that- and it's only a handful of them that do it. But it feels awkward to me.

I don't have that problem and I'm grateful. It'd bug me to no end. People shouldn't vent about their spouses to others, especially not on a public forum. At least, that's what I told Yellow last night when I was bugging him to take out the trash, AGAIN.

*shakes her head*

[Dragon Lady]

Dah!!!! How'd that make it on here! Katya! You DO know everything!

[Katya]

Dah!!!! How'd that make it on here! Katya! You DO know everything!

<-- My all-seeing eyes.

[Dragon Lady]

Dah!!!! How'd that make it on here! Katya! You DO know everything!

<-- My all-seeing eyes.

Ok, that's a little creepy. My mental image of you just got a whole lot scarier. Really, hon, those giant eyes just don't belong on that pretty little face.

[Katya]

Dah!!!! How'd that make it on here! Katya! You DO know everything!

<-- My all-seeing eyes.

Ok, that's a little creepy. My mental image of you just got a whole lot scarier. Really, hon, those giant eyes just don't belong on that pretty little face.

<-- My all-seeing eyes, with hip shades.

[Dragon Lady]

<-- My all-seeing eyes, with hip shades.

Better. Much better.