Callings

[mic0]

If you want to read a great book that goes past the wedding day check out, "The Beautiful and the Damned" by Fitzgerald. /random

[vorpal blade]

I think it might be fairly common in literature that a person has an impression that they will marry someone, or that they should marry someone, and then they let their fears, or the persuasion of others take them away from marrying that person. I’m thinking of Jane Austen’s Persuasion for one. Or maybe they don’t like the person at first, even though it seems right, and let their pride get in the way. In a tragedy it ends that way. I think everyone believes tragedies are great literature, but we seldom reread a tragedy.

[Katya]

Should someone be worried that they haven't met the right person because they didn't have that spiritual impression upon meeting someone?

Of course not.

[krebscout]

I think it might be fairly common in literature that a person has an impression that they will marry someone, or that they should marry someone, and then they let their fears, or the persuasion of others take them away from marrying that person. I’m thinking of Jane Austen’s Persuasion for one. Or maybe they don’t like the person at first, even though it seems right, and let their pride get in the way. In a tragedy it ends that way. I think everyone believes tragedies are great literature, but we seldom reread a tragedy.

You don't reread them? I do.

Also, I don't know if you meant to make this funny, but "the persuasion of others take them away from marrying that person. I’m thinking of Jane Austen’s Persuasion for one. Or maybe they don’t like the person at first, even though it seems right, and let their pride get in the way..." made me laugh out loud. Perhaps there's some prejudice involved, as well?

[TheAnswerIs42]

The unfortunate thing is the fiction doesn't describe what happens after marriage because it is relatively boring, in certain ways. There is no question about how things are going to turn out anymore. The only drama of interest comes if it doesn't work out, and therefore lacks a happy ending. I know my life is currently boring from that standpoint. Today I'm happily married. We might have a disagreement tomorrow, but I'll still be happily married the day after that. So who cares? But my dating/engagement story is much more entertaining, as is everybody's.

And Katya is right. Sometimes we need to be guided in things, and sometimes we just get to bumble around and figure things out on our own. I do the same things to my kids. Sometime I directly tell my son to do something, because he might not figure it out on his own, but let my daughter explore what happens so she learns that way. The next day it might switch. But, again, strange spiritual impressions make for better stories to tell. So we hear about them more often.

[vorpal blade]

You don't reread them? I do.

Also, I don't know if you meant to make this funny, but "the persuasion of others take them away from marrying that person. I’m thinking of Jane Austen’s Persuasion for one. Or maybe they don’t like the person at first, even though it seems right, and let their pride get in the way..." made me laugh out loud. Perhaps there's some prejudice involved, as well?

Well, the mention of pride just after mentioning Jane Austen, was not entirely accidental. I had a good laugh when I read your response.

I know in my family if we have a movie that is really funny it is watched over and over again. If it is a tragedy it gets watched only once. I'm not too inclined to read a tragedy in the first place. There has to be a compelling reason making me do it. I don't choose to read them if I can avoid it. But tragic movies I'll watch once. Maybe it is just my family.

[Dragon Lady]

I don't like watching tragedies. Hotel Rawanda and Power of One are some of my brother's favorite movies. But they make me hurt inside. So I don't like to watch them.

[krebscout]

See, that's interesting. Having kids is a life-changing, dramatic event. Each time. Moving to a new house in a new location, getting a job, getting laid off, mid-life crises, your parents aging and dying, the hefty responsibility of creating and raising good, well-adjusted members of society, watching our own bodies and minds age and decay before our eyes...these are all big things, and most are fairly dramatic. Are they "boring" because they're so universal? Because some of them are dragged out over a long timeline? I think we're partially trained to think that married life is boring because all the books and movies we consumed growing up treated it that way.

And some of my favorite books are non-dramatic, plotless. I've spewed on the Board about Nicholson Baker before, but his books, cover to cover, only span a matter of minutes. They're about his thoughts, his character. And I adore them. They do effectively reflect real life, partially because they're so plotless. The only thing that "happens" in Room Temperature is that the narrator rocks his baby to sleep. It's actually a great example of literature tackling domestic life, and I love it.

As for spiritual impressions about spouses-to-be, doesn't most of this presuppose that there is a "right one" to begin with? I've written several board answers about my feelings on this premise.

When I met Sauron I thought he was cute, but I was dating somebody else. A few months later (after having broken it off with the other dude), I wrote in my journal, "What if I ended up marrying this guy (Sauron)?" I had started to develop a little crush by then, was figuring he liked me back, and I think I had a hunch/hope that we would get married. But I don't think it was an impression or a premonition. Just prediction mixed with wishin'. We got married just under four years after that.

[Katya]

We got married just under four years after that.

Crazy Mormon whirlwind romance!

[krebscout]

We got married just under four years after that.

Crazy Mormon whirlwind romance!

It would have been, if it weren't for the mission.

[Katya]

We got married just under four years after that.

Crazy Mormon whirlwind romance!

It would have been, if it weren't for the mission.

Crazy Mormon missions! Did you meet at EFY? (Or was it another summer camp? Or am I thinking of someone else?)

[Dead Cat]

Crazy Mormon missions! Did you meet at EFY? (Or was it another summer camp? Or am I thinking of someone else?)

Claudio and his wife met at EFY, I know that much.

[C is for]

Waldorf and Sauron met at Y Weekend!

/random knowledge

[Katya]

Crazy Mormon missions! Did you meet at EFY? (Or was it another summer camp? Or am I thinking of someone else?)

Claudio and his wife met at EFY, I know that much.

Yeah, I remember that (because I remember making fun of them for it). But I thought that krebscout and Mr. krebscout met at a BYU camp, too.

[Katya]

Waldorf and Sauron met at Y Weekend!

/random knowledge

Excellent!

. . .

What the heck is Y Weekend?

[Unit of Energy]

Y weekend was a program where BYU invited high school seniors with a 29 or higher on their ACT and an expressed interest in BYU to visit BYU for a weekend. I don't know that it still happens, but I did go when I was invited in 2005.

[krebscout]

Good memory, C4. Yeah, we met at the Fine Arts-themed Y weekend, 2003. In the conference room of the little La Quinta (I think it's now some other hotel) across the corner from Helaman Halls, if you wanted to know the location.

[Katya]

Y weekend was a program where BYU invited high school seniors with a 29 or higher on their ACT and an expressed interest in BYU to visit BYU for a weekend. I don't know that it still happens, but I did go when I was invited in 2005.

I was never invited to any such event. (Of course, maybe that's because I already lived in Provo.)

[bobtheenchantedone]

Y weekend was a program where BYU invited high school seniors with a 29 or higher on their ACT and an expressed interest in BYU to visit BYU for a weekend. I don't know that it still happens, but I did go when I was invited in 2005.

I was never invited to any such event. (Of course, maybe that's because I already lived in Provo.)

Ditto.

[Dragon Lady]

Nor was I. And I didn't live in Provo. Oh, but I wasn't a high school senior. I transferred from BYU-I.