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LDS church "discipline" for a victim of statutory rape

Posted: Tue Sep 15, 2015 2:26 pm
by Portia
Why, why, why would a seventeen-year old girl be "disciplined" by the LDS Church after being manipulated into having sex with a grown-ass man of 35+ who was in a position of power over her?!?!

This is so disgusting on so many levels. She has clearly been scarred enough by the experience even years later. To have the added insult and humiliation of formal discipline makes me so incredibly enraged. What is this, Italy in 1960? MNGNGHHTNGHEHGNG

I heard through the grapevine that the "you lose your 'virtue' (i.e., your maleness, etymologically) when you're raped" scripture came up last Sunday. FUN TIMES.

Re: LDS church "discipline" for a victim of statutory rape

Posted: Tue Sep 15, 2015 2:57 pm
by Whistler
I've heard that victims of sexual abuse often think of themselves as complicit in their abuse, and it sounds like this question-asker feels that way. Okay, she probably enjoyed having a mentor and an adult man to talk to, but she clearly wasn't looking for sex, and her abuser took advantage of the situation. I hope she can find a forum where others can help her work through her personal narrative of what happened so she can have a healthier life. Reading what she wrote of her experience, I agree with Portia in that she definitely sounds like a victim of abuse.

As far as church discipline, it's possible that her abuser wasn't a member and that she went to her bishop herself and felt the need to go through the church discipline process (victims often feel shameful and "dirty" and interpret this as guilt for a sin). But... that doesn't mean it was necessary. I wish that her ward leadership had served her needs better.

Apologetic, if you're reading this, we can listen to your story.

Re: LDS church "discipline" for a victim of statutory rape

Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2015 4:27 pm
by Emiliana
Yeah, the fact that she said he guilted her into it and then she cried all the time at first..........not cool.

Re: LDS church "discipline" for a victim of statutory rape

Posted: Sun Sep 20, 2015 4:36 pm
by NerdGirl
Totally agree.