cafeteria Mormons

[Portia]

So an advantage for me of abandoning a New Order perspective is that it allowed me to be more honest with myself and others.

With my medical history, drinking coffee IS a good idea for me. It aligns with my conscience (since I don't look for feeling-based evidence, I often use scientific "testimony" to validate my guy feelings. Sometimes there's mixed evidence, but my brain functions in a scientific testing mode). OTOH, I consciously take no-alcohol days. And my coworkers and friends are free to think whatever they please of this information.

It's a lot easier for me to not stress out about other people's choices when I realized that I was comparing my actual beliefs to ones I did not share.

Whether or not this means anyone else will benefit from similar honesty is not my call. Fortunately, I had fewer family and relationship pressures than many others.

Even the minor change of my father acknowledging my decision to be secular means I don't feel like I'm lying, or have to keep up a front.

Anyway, maybe that could be useful for any active Mormons as they think about fellowship. It can sometimes create a lot of pressure, but YMMV!

[Portia]

Gut feelings. Guy feelings, ummmm I have completely irrational beliefs there ;-)

[Zedability]

Yeah I have the feeling that things would be a lot less stressful if you applied scientific evidence to your guy feelings, haha.

[Portia]

Yeah I have the feeling that things would be a lot less stressful if you applied scientific evidence to your guy feelings, haha.

LOL something to bring into couples' therapy?

"So my life is driven by a not-wholly-unfounded fear of abandonment. EVIDENCE ME, DOCTOR"