Dating multiple girls (62580)

[Imogen]

my friend travis wooed a girl until he wore her down and now they're dating. so....take that for what you will.

[Marduk]

I'm just laughing at all of these girls saying "yeah, don't try to woo. It is just wierd" and thinking to myself, "you must all be white. Very white."

[Whistler]

that's so racist

[Marduk]

Is it racist to recognize different cultural norms? It is much more popular in most western cultures that aren't white (south and central America, Spain, Italy, France, eastern Europe, Oceanic cultures) that the male suitor is expected to vigorously pursue a woman. The whole being turned off by that is, frankly, only found in white culture.

[Whistler]

well, maybe if you're attributing something to culture but not race you can make that distinction. I don't believe that the two are the same thing, even though there are correlations between the two.

[thebigcheese]

Does "Hispanic" count as a culture or a race?

[Eirene]

that's so racist

I read this post to the tune of "That's So Raven."

[Commander Keen]

I'm pretty sure that if someone came along and read the titles of threads and then the last page of each respective thread, there would be little to no relation between the two. Just saying. Anyhow, on with the discussion about racism...?

[mic0]

Is it racist to recognize different cultural norms? It is much more popular in most western cultures that aren't white (south and central America, Spain, Italy, France, eastern Europe, Oceanic cultures) that the male suitor is expected to vigorously pursue a woman. The whole being turned off by that is, frankly, only found in white culture.

Mr. Mico is eastern European and SERIOUSLY fits this description you just gave. Even before a few of his early BYU crushes found out he wasn't LDS they were a little creeped out because he just showered them with gifts and asked them on dates and all that which isn't entirely normal here. I was really confused when we first started dating, too. Anyway, just vouching for Marduk's description. I wouldn't really say it is racist, just an observation.

[edit] But maybe instead of "white girls" he could say "U.S. girls" or something that is a little less... off-putting.

[Imogen]

i would't mind being wooed. i think it's what has been seriously lacking in my relationships. take that for what you will.

[thebigcheese]

i would't mind being wooed. i think it's what has been seriously lacking in my relationships. take that for what you will.

There's nothing wrong with wooing a girl -- within the context of a relationship. It's the early dating stages where it becomes a problem. For example, buying a dozen roses for a girl on the first date and taking her to a really expensive restaurant. That's called trying too hard, and you're bound to come across too strongly. But if you've already been dating someone for a while, the same gesture is considered sweet and kind. That's the difference.

[Marduk]

i would't mind being wooed. i think it's what has been seriously lacking in my relationships. take that for what you will.

I wouldn't mind wooing Imogen. Take that for what you will.

[Imogen]

i would't mind being wooed. i think it's what has been seriously lacking in my relationships. take that for what you will.

There's nothing wrong with wooing a girl -- within the context of a relationship. It's the early dating stages where it becomes a problem. For example, buying a dozen roses for a girl on the first date and taking her to a really expensive restaurant. That's called trying too hard, and you're bound to come across too strongly. But if you've already been dating someone for a while, the same gesture is considered sweet and kind. That's the difference.

i disagree, but that's just me. of course, i've never been on a real date, so who knows how'd i feel about that if it really happened. but i'd be very flattered.

[Imogen]

i would't mind being wooed. i think it's what has been seriously lacking in my relationships. take that for what you will.

I wouldn't mind wooing Imogen. Take that for what you will.

you're funny.

[Laser Jock]

There's nothing wrong with wooing a girl -- within the context of a relationship. It's the early dating stages where it becomes a problem. For example, buying a dozen roses for a girl on the first date and taking her to a really expensive restaurant. That's called trying too hard, and you're bound to come across too strongly. But if you've already been dating someone for a while, the same gesture is considered sweet and kind. That's the difference.

i disagree, but that's just me. of course, i've never been on a real date, so who knows how'd i feel about that if it really happened. but i'd be very flattered.

Huh. From some of your past posts it sounded like you'd been in relationships before...maybe I was mistaken? What are you counting as a real date?

[Imogen]

There's nothing wrong with wooing a girl -- within the context of a relationship. It's the early dating stages where it becomes a problem. For example, buying a dozen roses for a girl on the first date and taking her to a really expensive restaurant. That's called trying too hard, and you're bound to come across too strongly. But if you've already been dating someone for a while, the same gesture is considered sweet and kind. That's the difference.

i disagree, but that's just me. of course, i've never been on a real date, so who knows how'd i feel about that if it really happened. but i'd be very flattered.

Huh. From some of your past posts it sounded like you'd been in relationships before...maybe I was mistaken? What are you counting as a real date?

i've been in relationships, but they grew out of friendships. i was very close friends with all but 1 of my boyfriends before we were a couple. i've never casually dated someone like "hey you seem interesting. let's go to dinner or whatever date-like activity people do and see if we like each other." i've been on dates with my boyfriends, but it's not the same to me since we already knew each other.

[Whistler]

eh, with the racist comment I meant it to be funny, it was taken seriously, so I decided to go along with it rather than explain myself

[Marduk]

eh, with the racist comment I meant it to be funny, it was taken seriously, so I decided to go along with it rather than explain myself

No offense Whistler, but you are the most deadpan person I've ever known, and that goes doubly so for text. Combine that with the fact that I've been called a racist more times than I can count, and it means I had to take it seriously, whether you were serious or not.

[Whistler]

does deadpan mean you can't tell when I'm trying to be funny?

Anyway. You can call us all honkies as long as we can call you something similarly funny/offensive. hahaha

[thebigcheese]

I wouldn't mind if somebody started calling me cracka.