Humor will not be tolerated!! -Portia

Well, I'm okay with a little Proverbs 22:10 going on.

I...am a little surprised by the reactions here. Most of us here aren't innocent of contention. Even if VB was often in the center of it, we didn't need to keep prodding the fires. Perhaps it's my guilt complex kicking in, but I'm not satisfied with squeezing someone to the point where they're hurt and need to walk away. Charity is not as easy to extend to those whose personalities may clash with our own, but that very struggle is the subject of half the New Testament.

Am I way off base here?

This isn't the first one of these that Vorpal has sent to me personally. I went through my email inbox and found at least two others. Each of the previous times, my guilt got the better of me and I asked him to come back. This time I'm content to let him know that what he was specifically apologizing to me for was not entirely or even primarily his fault and let the chips fall where they may. If he comes back with a slightly different attitude, that's great. If not, I can't honestly say that I'll miss his input.

i don't think i'll miss him all that much. i always cringed when i saw he had posted something because it was either 1)way too long, 2)extremely rude and condescending, or 3)some combination of the two. when he wasn't trying to prove what dumb children we all were, his posts could be fun. however, whenever he was trying to make a point, he tended to just overwhelm whoever he was arguing with until they gave up.

I'm not sure how I feel about us debating the pros/cons of a person. Who isn't... you know... running for public office.

ahem. wrote:I'm not sure how I feel about us debating the pros/cons of a person. Who isn't... you know... running for public office.

I don't see it that way. Think of it more as his funeral; or at least, the funeral for his online persona.

The thing I will miss most about Vorpal is that his strong-handed approach made me think more intensely and dynamically about my own understanding of certain issues. Certainly it felt frustrating when debates mired around certain points, and neither side yielded much ground, but it allowed for either side to develop a more cohesive and logical argument to their proper position.

The man was stubborn, opinionated, condescending, and often callous. And I'm going to miss him terribly.

Vorpal, if you're reading this, I still have a chess game for you.

Marduk wrote:

ahem. wrote:I'm not sure how I feel about us debating the pros/cons of a person. Who isn't... you know... running for public office.

I don't see it that way. Think of it more as his funeral; or at least, the funeral for his online persona.

The thing I will miss most about Vorpal is that his strong-handed approach made me think more intensely and dynamically about my own understanding of certain issues. Certainly it felt frustrating when debates mired around certain points, and neither side yielded much ground, but it allowed for either side to develop a more cohesive and logical argument to their proper position.

The man was stubborn, opinionated, condescending, and often callous. And I'm going to miss him terribly.

Vorpal, if you're reading this, I still have a chess game for you.

A less blunt ditto, more or less. Except I'm horrible at chess.

I have to admit, I was a bit surprised to get a PM from him informing me of his departure. I'm still relatively new here, but I actually rather enjoyed watching some of his vigorous discussions. The picture I posted was completely tongue-in-cheek, so I hope that wasn't what pushed him over the edge.

In my mind, Vorpal Blade will always be the Alien to Marduk's Predator. Or the other way around, if you'd rather.

Marduk wrote:

ahem. wrote:I'm not sure how I feel about us debating the pros/cons of a person. Who isn't... you know... running for public office.

I don't see it that way. Think of it more as his funeral; or at least, the funeral for his online persona.

That's how I feel about it, more or less. I don't see anything wrong with a little group processing. He was a big guy around here.

TheBlackSheep wrote:

Marduk wrote:

ahem. wrote:I'm not sure how I feel about us debating the pros/cons of a person. Who isn't... you know... running for public office.

I don't see it that way. Think of it more as his funeral; or at least, the funeral for his online persona.

That's how I feel about it, more or less. I don't see anything wrong with a little group processing. He was a big guy around here.

its like group therapy... in an online chat room. woo, social work!

Haha, this is awesome, talking behind someone's back like this. I love it.

For what it's worth, when I got his goodbye, I thought he thought I was leaving. That shows how frequently I come here.

How is in the open where anyone can see "behind someone's back?"

I know for a fact Vorpal has read this thread.

yeah, I figured as much.

okay, okay. I actually thought about this a little, and Krebscout's comment. I am fine with tolerating/accepting people that I don't agree with, but I also believe that in a dialogue on a forum, there is some kind of unspoken trust that you will try to understand the other person's point of view (I dunno, can Levinas back me up here?). I feel like VB violated that trust (though it's possible he was trying his best to understand, but for some reason, can't?), so I feel like I can forgive him, but that I don't have to trust him again. Does that make sense?

I don't think it was so much that he didn't understand others' points of view, but rather that he wasn't sure that others understood his. But that's 100% opinion there.

Dragon Lady wrote:I don't think it was so much that he didn't understand others' points of view, but rather that he wasn't sure that others understood his. But that's 100% opinion there.

This is absolutely a possibility. If you feel like the other side doesn't understand your viewpoint (regardless of whether that's actually true), you may try to state and restate and restate and restate and restate your opinion until you feel like you've finally gotten through to them. It's another one of those "talking to a brick wall" problems. Someone tries to have a conversation with you, but you only say the same thing back to them over and over and over. In that case, you're not really having a conversation -- and they start to feel like you're not really listening because you continually give the same response.

Dragon Lady wrote:I don't think it was so much that he didn't understand others' points of view . . .

Given the number of people who expressed frustration with his putting words in their mouth, dismissing their experiences, or using straw man arguments, it doesn't seem as though he communicated well that he saw others' points of view, if, indeed, he did.

Maybe he thought he understood and sometimes didn't.

I guess I just have a really hard time believing that he was willfully misunderstanding and putting words in people's mouths because he's a jerk. He really just doesn't strike me as that kind of person. I also saw him apologize several times and admit that he interpreted something incorrectly.

Dragon Lady wrote:Maybe he thought he understood and sometimes didn't.

I guess I just have a really hard time believing that he was willfully misunderstanding and putting words in people's mouths because he's a jerk. He really just doesn't strike me as that kind of person. I also saw him apologize several times and admit that he interpreted something incorrectly.

Admit it DL, you have a thing for Sean Connery and his 'tar has you too twitterpated to see anything wrong in him.

wired wrote:

Dragon Lady wrote:Maybe he thought he understood and sometimes didn't.

I guess I just have a really hard time believing that he was willfully misunderstanding and putting words in people's mouths because he's a jerk. He really just doesn't strike me as that kind of person. I also saw him apologize several times and admit that he interpreted something incorrectly.

Admit it DL, you have a thing for Sean Connery and his 'tar has you too twitterpated to see anything wrong in him.

[snort] Well, my mom has always told me that Sean Connery is handsome. But I assure you, I do not think Vorpal is innocent here. Nor do I think most of us are innocent in this either. As I've said multiple times.

Dragon Lady wrote:Maybe he thought he understood and sometimes didn't.

I guess I just have a really hard time believing that he was willfully misunderstanding and putting words in people's mouths because he's a jerk. He really just doesn't strike me as that kind of person. I also saw him apologize several times and admit that he interpreted something incorrectly.

I don't think he ever willfully misunderstood people and I don't think he's a jerk. I think he genuinely has a very, very difficult time seeing a point of view other than his own.