Humor will not be tolerated!! -Portia

This fall and winter have been so expensive! Since October I've had to buy plane tickets, heating oil, a new coat, I've had my car in the shop twice, and now it looks like my boots may not last the season.

Digit wrote:I got a check for three cents from some Ebay class action lawsuit I didn't even know about. The law firm's fees from my "share" were 50 cents.

What are you going to do with your newly-found fortune?

I think I'll wait in line at the bank for a teller instead of using the ATM machine with a deposit slip carefully written in nice penmanship and say with a serious face "I'd like to deposit all of it into my checking account."

Digit wrote:I think I'll wait in line at the bank for a teller instead of using the ATM machine with a deposit slip carefully written in nice penmanship and say with a serious face "I'd like to deposit all of it into my checking account."

Do it! Do it!

I think I really will
In other news of fortuitous financial changes, this is interesting: One Occupy Wall Street protester named Tracy Postert (a biochemist Ph.D. herself) now has a job on Wall Street at John Thomas Financial, fittingly enough, researching early-stage biotech startups for the firm. And she's preparing for the test to become a broker. I bet she's not well-spoken-of back on the sidewalks.

C is for wrote:Well, I got it right away.

Edited to add a tag:
/hoity-toityness

(and edited again because the first edit didn't show up)

Well excuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me for not being Mormon and/or ever having been to Utah!

/pretend offense

Emiliana wrote:

C is for wrote:Well, I got it right away.

Edited to add a tag:
/hoity-toityness

(and edited again because the first edit didn't show up)

Well excuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me for not being Mormon and/or ever having been to Utah!

/pretend offense

You should be sorry for not understanding a newly-coined abbreviation that turned out to be a reference to a piece of local history from a medium-sized city in the mountain west! *shakes fist*

Digit wrote:I think I'll wait in line at the bank for a teller instead of using the ATM machine with a deposit slip carefully written in nice penmanship and say with a serious face "I'd like to deposit all of it into my checking account."

I vote you put it all in savings.

Dragon Lady wrote:

Digit wrote:I think I'll wait in line at the bank for a teller instead of using the ATM machine with a deposit slip carefully written in nice penmanship and say with a serious face "I'd like to deposit all of it into my checking account."

I vote you put it all in savings.

Maybe I should ask the teller to split it evenly between the two

Digit wrote:

Dragon Lady wrote:

Digit wrote:I think I'll wait in line at the bank for a teller instead of using the ATM machine with a deposit slip carefully written in nice penmanship and say with a serious face "I'd like to deposit all of it into my checking account."

I vote you put it all in savings.

Maybe I should ask the teller to split it evenly between the two

Or just spend a long time deciding how much you want in each account.

My problem is, do you still have to pay the lawyers 50 cents? So in the end you get negative 47 cents?

C is for wrote:My problem is, do you still have to pay the lawyers 50 cents? So in the end you get negative 47 cents?

My understanding from the letter is, from the class action lawsuit, my portion was 53 cents, then the lawyers took 50 cents.

My roommate was telling me last night about a friend of hers who got a check for $0.01. I vote you get someone to give you a check for that much and then take it to the bank teller.

Digit wrote:One of these days I'll learn how to Wikicode and reference things to the satisfaction of those people who love to undo other people's contributions.

You have inspired me. I reverted an edit today but I left a nice explanation as to why. (No exclamation points in an encyclopedia, please.)

Defy V wrote:I figured it out after a few seconds, but my first thought was it was some kind of drug like Lortab. Don't know what Protab would be used for.

Protab: the happiness, equanimity-seeking, foot-mouth-elbow pill of THE FUTURE!*

*may cause nausea, itching, Carillon disorder, General Sherman's March to the Sea, and virgin birth.

It's so weird to come here and see all the red titles, only to find that I've already read it all over Marduk's shoulder.

Also, I have been thinking that for the past few months.

Twelve to thirteen pages to write (and do the research for...), and about six and a half hours to do it. Here we go.

If I die, Marduk can inherit my copy of Mormon Doctrine. And I leave Portia my autographed copy of The Family: A Proclamation to the World.

Is there any particular reason Random Thread 9 is still sticky?

Craig Jessop wrote:Twelve to thirteen pages to write (and do the research for...), and about six and a half hours to do it. Here we go.

If I die, Marduk can inherit my copy of Mormon Doctrine. And I leave Portia my autographed copy of The Family: A Proclamation to the World.

I do not envy you at all.

HA! After checking the syllabus, I found out the paper needs to be in Courier New font... all of a sudden I jumped from 3 pages to 5! Maybe this isn't going to be such a long day, after all...