If A Guy...

[Tally M.]

My guy friends are absolutely insistent that you shouldn't ask a girl out over text, and if he does so, the girl should reject his asking. So that's why it seems ambiguous--he asks over a text, but doesn't use the word "date", and it's hard to tell if it was intended to be a date.

[Giovanni Schwartz]

if he asks you over a text and thinks it counts as a date, he's a loser.

[Tally M.]

Thus the thread. I have no idea if it was a date. Or if he thought it was a date.

Though, I have been asked out on a date--clearly labeled as such--before over text, and I didn't really think anything of it. It didn't really bug me since it was our normal mode of communication, and we were in two different time zones...

[mic0]

What about over instant messenger? I never felt weird about the two guys I ever really seriously dated initially asking me out while on gchat or in an email. That was how we talked! It was normal! If texting is how you talk on a semi-regular basis, is it really so strange to ask someone out that way (with the caveat that it is clearly a date)?

ETA*: Yes, Tally M! I didn't notice your post. Good, glad to hear we feel the same way on this type of situation.

*Still my new favorite acronym!

[Tally M.]

If it's a formal thing--such as a dance--I would say ask in person (or creatively...) but not over text. However, I personally don't have a whole lot of qualms about being asked out over IM or text. Then again...I've only been asked at over the phone once, and in person...twice? I think?

[Zedability]

The first time M asked me on a date, it was through facebook, since he didn't have my phone number and we didn't see each other in real life except for randomly running into each other. So it didn't bother me.

[Marduk]

(or creatively...)

No no no no no.

A million times no.

Please stop doing this mormons!

[Tally M.]

It's not just Mormons. My high school had only two Mormons, and EVERYBODY asked creatively for formal dances.

[Zedability]

(or creatively...)

No no no no no.

A million times no.

Please stop doing this mormons!

I agree! This is just stupid.

When I was asked to prom, my childhood best friend called me and said, "Hey, um...doyouwantogotopromwithmejustasfriends?...okay...okay, seeyouthenbye." I still said yes. Haha.

[Yarjka]

It's not just Mormons. My high school had only two Mormons, and EVERYBODY asked creatively for formal dances.

I'm pretty sure Mormons are the only people who keep the tradition alive after high school, though. Thankfully, it seems to die out after freshman year, at least until it's time for the ultimate asking out of "will you marry me?"

[Portia]

It's not just Mormons. My high school had only two Mormons, and EVERYBODY asked creatively for formal dances.

I'm pretty sure Mormons are the only people who keep the tradition alive after high school, though. Thankfully, it seems to die out after freshman year, at least until it's time for the ultimate asking out of "will you marry me?"

Any guy who involves a jumbotron or either of our families in a marriage proposal is getting a swift no.

[Tally M.]

It's not just Mormons. My high school had only two Mormons, and EVERYBODY asked creatively for formal dances.

I'm pretty sure Mormons are the only people who keep the tradition alive after high school, though. Thankfully, it seems to die out after freshman year, at least until it's time for the ultimate asking out of "will you marry me?"

Any guy who involves a jumbotron or either of our families in a marriage proposal is getting a swift no.

I'm with you. I refuse to be proposed to anywhere near a jumbotron.

[Giovanni Schwartz]

Ladies, what is each of yours perfect proposal?

[Genuine Article]

We got engaged in the course of talking about where we thought things were going, but once he had the ring we did a formal sort of proposal in a windmill, which made my day.

[Squirrel]

Yes. Totally agree. I think the quieter and more clear-of-other-people(spectators), the better. I'd love it to be somewhere out in nature. A hike to the top of a mountain- eating lunch at the top, then.... Surprise! NO OTHER PEOPLE! And I'm all in favor of unidentified-future-spouse to buy a cheap fake ring for the proposal. I'd like to pick out my own ring if I'm going to wear it for the rest of eternity.

[Giovanni Schwartz]

@Genuine I seem to recall you saying that he tricked you into being engaged...

[Squirrel]

Replace "to buy" with "buying"

[Portia]

Somewhere private and romantic, like the peak of a mountain, after at least several months if not closer to a year and decent discussion of life plans. However, I'm the type who would love to be surprised with a ring.

[Tally M.]

Ladies, what is each of yours perfect proposal?

I want it to be personal--something has to do with an inside joke, or something we have in common--and kind of private (I'm not a fan of huge ordeals). But otherwise, I don't have a whole lot of specifics.

[Marduk]

if I'm going to wear it for the rest of eternity.

Which is pretty unlikely, seeing as how the tradition has only existed for about a hundred years here.