Humor will not be tolerated!! -Portia

“Zero. Ghosts are not alive, therefore none of them can ‘live’ anywhere.” BYU Ghosts

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Amazing Tao Has Found the Answer to the Whistle Question

Tao finally answering the whistle question was monumental, yes, but RP's movie answer made me laugh and cheer. Props.

I especially loved his response to 'a pox upon your house.' That, and the quote in the question title, are the main reasons for me choosing that answer.

"Excellent fondling and groping skills" was so incredibly inappropriate* that it was pretty much guaranteed to get my vote. That, and I could read it one sitting.

Though monkey #23 is pretty funny . . . haha

*in general, not for the answer.

Booo, monkeys! I'm over the playing cards. Funny once, not funny twice.

I voted for the fun with languages one. It was quick to read. Less is definitely more.

Benvolio wrote:Booo, monkeys! I'm over the playing cards. Funny once, not funny twice.

Boo, Benvolio! We're over the...um...er...You're funny once...oh dear, that's not working either...

Boo, Bevolio!!!!

Okay, there are 100 of you, and you can't come up with a better comeback than that? I'm afraid I'm losing faith in your "Monkey overlords are good for humans" campaign.

ahem. wrote:Okay, there are 100 of you, and you can't come up with a better comeback than that? I'm afraid I'm losing faith in your "Monkey overlords are good for humans" campaign.

Perhaps you did not note that we added three additional exclamation points after our previous attempts at insults were stymied, thus making our comeback thrice as biting.

100 Typing Monkeys wrote:Perhaps you did not note that we added three additional exclamation points after our previous attempts at insults were stymied, thus making our comeback thrice as biting.

...supposedly.

The excellent Terry Pratchett somewhere (I believe in the book "Maskerade") defines a mobocracy's IQ as the lowest IQ of a mob member divided by the number of mob members. I'm not saying that 100 typing monkeys are a mob, but it does seem like their intellect is suffering just a touch . . . Pratchett also points out in "Reaper Man" that only deranged minds use four exclamation points at a time. I'm just sayin'.

Wisteria wrote:The excellent Terry Pratchett somewhere (I believe in the book "Maskerade") defines a mobocracy's IQ as the lowest IQ of a mob member divided by the number of mob members. I'm not saying that 100 typing monkeys are a mob, but it does seem like their intellect is suffering just a touch . . . Pratchett also points out in "Reaper Man" that only deranged minds use four exclamation points at a time. I'm just sayin'.

It seems to us that the only thing Mr. Pratchett is excellent at is being stupid. SNAP! (we have determined by perusing sundry interweb discussion boards that "snap" is an appropriate exclamation after rendering a particularly powerful rejoinder)

I prefer "BAM!" or, after an especially excellent comeback, "WABAM!"

I think there were too many question addressed to the Monkeys that posted yesterday.

Portia wrote:I think there were too many question addressed to the Monkeys that posted yesterday.

We quite agree, the questions just kept coming, and some of them were quite time intensive to write. But, what can we do? Readers don't know when four other readers have written us a question, so sometimes we're asked questions in bunches.

Good thing there's 100 of you then. Unless, of course, you combined only have the intelligence and strength of one human -- pretty pathetic, monkeys, pretty pathetic.

Craig Jessop wrote:Good thing there's 100 of you then. Unless, of course, you combined only have the intelligence and strength of one human -- pretty pathetic, monkeys, pretty pathetic.

Whoa, Mr. Jessop, we're not entirely certain we like the aspersions you are casting upon us. Rest assured that each of us is possessed of the wisdom of Solomon and the endurance of Atlas. But with such abilities come more rigorous standards. The need to meticulously draft our answers to the high standards all 100 of us maintain should not be deemed as evidence that we are equal to humans. If we slumped to human standards undoubtedly we could handle the entirety of the Board inbox.

"Oh, the Yellow Rose of Monkeys, that I'm a-goin' a see..."

Yeah, for some reason that's what popped into my head. I should quit getting on the message board during English class.

100 Typing Monkeys wrote:Rest assured that each of us is possessed of the wisdom of Solomon

Except for #27, the glue sniffer.

I just realized that we have very few questions for tomorrow's poll. I should go back and look for some more.

Dead Cat wrote:

100 Typing Monkeys wrote:Rest assured that each of us is possessed of the wisdom of Solomon

Except for #27, the glue sniffer.

This is true. And in the interest of full disclosure, #23 is not overflowing with wisdom juice either. But the rest of us carry their load just fine. 98 monkeys with the wisdom of Solomon is nothing to raise your olfactory organ at.