Name chains

[Katya]

Did your parents ever call you by a sibling's or relative's name when you were growing up? Did they ever go through two or more wrong names before they got to yours? Language Log calls this phenomenon "name chains" and suggests that it may be based on analogical substitution. (I.e., your parent reaches for a name out of the "children" or "female relatives" group and grabs the wrong one.)

If this has happened to you, I'm curious to know whose names you have been called (and whose names you haven't been called).

I've been called my brother's name and he's been called mine. (We don't have other siblings, so he doesn't have any brothers and I don't have any sisters. I wonder if our mother would have been more likely to call me by my sister's name if I had both a brother and a sister. Also, I'm not sure if my dad has ever called me or my brother by the other one's name, but our mom would have had more opportunity to do so, since she was more often home.)

My mom has called me by both her sisters' names (both younger), but never by any of her brothers' names. My dad has called me by his younger sisters' names (especially the youngest), but never by his older sisters' names. (He doesn't have any brothers.) I think my dad has also called my by my mom's name.

In the case of my mom calling me and my brother by each other's name, I think it's clear she's grabbing names out of the "child" group. When she calls me by her sisters' names (but never her brothers' names), it sounds like she's grabbing names out of the "female relatives" group. When my dad calls my by his younger sisters' names (but never or rarely his older sisters' names), it sounds like hes' grabbing names out of the "younger relatives" group (which I suppose also technically accounts for calling me by my mom's name). Or maybe we could combine those two and say that my parents both call me names out of the "younger female relatives" group.

Also, my mom once called my brother by the dog's name. I'm not sure what to make of that.

[TheAnswerIs42]

My mom did this all the time. I remember her remarking that in the beginning, she would start with the oldest boy's name and work her way down until she found the kid she wanted to talk to, but by the time I was in high school and the oldest was long gone off to college and life and married, she had slowly reversed things and now the youngest name was the first to come to mind, and she had to work her way up. She was much more likely to switch the names up among the boys, but occasionally I got called one of their names. (I'm the only girl.)

As a parent now, I can say that I find I usually mix them up when they are switching behavior, and mostly when they are misbehaving so I am thinking quickly. For example, if Pizza boy has been acting up all day, and then suddenly Shy girl does something, I'm still in "Pizza BOY!" mode and call her the wrong name. My husband mixed up the girls' names yesterday, but I don't do that as much. I did when Jasmine was first born, since I wasn't used to the name, but not as much anymore.

Was the dog named Indiana?

[Yarjka]

I sometimes call my daughter by my wife's name inadvertently. It works okay, though, because it's also my daughter's middle name.

My father-in-law is the worst at this. He will go through all four of my wife's siblings before getting to my wife's name. He's also substituted his son's name for mine.

[Zedability]

My mom called me by our dog's name once. I don't even like that dog.

[Digit]

George Foreman doesn't have that problem with his sons because all five of them are named George.

[thatonemom]

I mix up my oldest son and my husband's name pretty frequently. This makes my son laugh and my husband give me the side eyes. I never do that for my youngest son, though. Maybe because he's still a baby and we don't really "talk"? My husband does occasionally call our boys by the wrong name.

There were three kids, a dog, and a cat in my house growing up, and sometimes my parents would go through all the names before they hit the right one. Although I don't remember them ever referring to the pets by the wrong name. Interesting.

[Digit]

I wonder how Mr. and Mrs. Duggar would do on a timed test where they had five seconds to put a name to the face of each of their 19 kids whose names all start with the letter 'J'. On a note unrelated to name chaining, I wonder how much of the child-raising is offloaded from the mother to the kids in the Duggar family compared to families of more common sizes.

[Katya]

I mix up my oldest son and my husband's name pretty frequently. This makes my son laugh and my husband give me the side eyes. I never do that for my youngest son, though. Maybe because he's still a baby and we don't really "talk"?

Oooh, that's interesting. You'll have to see if you ever start mixing up the baby's name with either of the other names and report back!

Now that I think about it, I don't think my dad ever called me by his sisters' names until I was a teenager or maybe older.

[Squirrel]

My mom calls me the dog's name all the time..... At least the dog's a girl...

[bobtheenchantedone]

"Da- uh, Be- uh, Tyler!"

My dad said that once and we still remind him of it. Interesting that he started with the middle boy, went to the oldest, and then finally got to the youngest.

I think the boys in the family are more likely to get mixed up than the girls, because the boys are closer in age. However, the two youngest girls are constantly getting called by each other's names.

[Whistler]

Yes, my mom would frequently start out calling my older sister's name and switch to mine. Sometimes when I'm arguing with my dad he calls me my mom's name (and doesn't even notice).

[mic0]

My parents mix up our names all the time (me and two older brothers). I think the oldest brother gets the correct name most of the time while me and the second brother get mixed up (he is still 7 years older than me). Every child gets called by the dog's name occasionally, but no one gets called by the cats' names!! Weird, maybe because we don't "talk" to the cats as much?

Everyone in my immediate family occasionally calls me by my sister-in-law's name. Even my brother to whom she is married. But, I guess I understand, because when I'm around my family a lot I start wanting to call every male in the 28-32 years old range by each other's names. That is to say, I call my brothers by my husband's name and husband by my brother's names if we are all together. It's funny. Now, Katya, what have you determined from all our answers in addition to the LL post?

[UffishThought]

From my parents, I get my sister's name from time to time, but my brothers' names very rarely. I've gotten the dog once or twice (never the cat, but she's more recent).

From my grandparents I get my sister, female cousin, and my aunt and mom's name. I don't think they used to call me by their daughters' names, but I'm not sure how much of that is that they've started thinking of me as adult, and how much is that they have a hard time coming up with the right word these days, anyway.

Anecdote! My grandma told us about the little cannabis that someone brought to the nursing home for the veterans to play with. When my uncle told her she probably got the word wrong, she thought it was a miniature giraffe. Turned out it was a baby kangaroo. "But what IS a cannabis, then?" "Don't worry about it, Mom." "But I can't remember!" "It's a name for marijuana, Mom." "Oh! Ha! No, it wasn't that, for sure!" But then the next day she was back to calling it a cannabis again, when she was telling me about the kangaroo.

[krebscout]

I mix up my son and my husband every once in a while, and most of my siblings (all older than me) call me by their daughters' names and their daughters by mine. They say it's the "prominent little blonde girl in my life" mentality, so I often get called Bradyn, Brenna, Madison, or Brooklyn. The exceptions are my brother whose only daughter is a one-year-old with little hair and my sister whose children are half Korean.

Edit: Oh, I also get called by my sister's name a lot, but she and I have matching names. And I frequently got the name of a girl in my high school from the school faculty, whose name also fell into the category.

[The Happy Medium]

It's so interesting how many different factors go into lexical grouping. I get called by my sisters' names sometimes and from time to time my mom will call me by her younger sister's name if my mom has been hanging out with her recently. I usually don't get called by my brothers' names so I think it's probably the same as Katya, my parents draw out of the "female relative" group when they're trying to call my name.

On a somewhat related note I once spent 15 minutes on the phone with my grandma before she realized I wasn't my mom.

[Portia]

My great-aunt almost exclusively called me by my mom's name. If my name were Stephanie, my brother Leif, and my sister Addie, my mom would call my brother St-Leif and my sister St-L-Addie.

[Katya]

My great-aunt almost exclusively called me by my mom's name. If my name were Stephanie, my brother Leif, and my sister Addie, my mom would call my brother St-Leif and my sister St-L-Addie.

Right. When I was still at home, my brother and I used to joke that his name was K-Brother and mine was Br-Katya. (Or the equivalents, obviously.)

[Katya]

Now, Katya, what have you determined from all our answers in addition to the LL post?

I don't know, but I'm loving all of the categories involved, especially "prominent little blonde girl in my life." And the "matching names" issue makes for an added wrinkle.