Heights of SO
Moderator: Marduk
- SmurfBlueSnuggie
- Posts: 256
- Joined: Thu Jun 06, 2013 12:47 am
Heights of SO
I always love this conversation, so I want to chime in! http://theboard.byu.edu/questions/74823/
I have dated guys significantly taller than I am and guys almost my exact height. I much prefer taller. Partly because I'm shallow and want to seem dainty, but the fact that I also like really skinny guys negates that fact for the most part. A guy who is taller than me (even if he weighs significantly less) makes me feel safe. It's silly, but it's one of the things that I most love about having a boyfriend. I love when he can stand with his arm over my shoulder or wrapped around me and make me feel protected and claimed by him. Some shorter guys can give off this sense of protection too, but it's less common for me to feel it. So long as he can provide that, I'm not extremely picky on height.
So, short answer: I'm attracted to tall men. I also feel more protected by tall men. Therefore, given my druthers, I'd date only tall men. For me, tall is 6 ft and up. Anything closer to my height it'll all depend on his ability to make me feel safe and claimed.
I have dated guys significantly taller than I am and guys almost my exact height. I much prefer taller. Partly because I'm shallow and want to seem dainty, but the fact that I also like really skinny guys negates that fact for the most part. A guy who is taller than me (even if he weighs significantly less) makes me feel safe. It's silly, but it's one of the things that I most love about having a boyfriend. I love when he can stand with his arm over my shoulder or wrapped around me and make me feel protected and claimed by him. Some shorter guys can give off this sense of protection too, but it's less common for me to feel it. So long as he can provide that, I'm not extremely picky on height.
So, short answer: I'm attracted to tall men. I also feel more protected by tall men. Therefore, given my druthers, I'd date only tall men. For me, tall is 6 ft and up. Anything closer to my height it'll all depend on his ability to make me feel safe and claimed.
It doesn't matter what happened to get you to today, beyond shaping your understanding. What really matters is where you go from here.
Re: Heights of SO
How tall are you?
- SmurfBlueSnuggie
- Posts: 256
- Joined: Thu Jun 06, 2013 12:47 am
Re: Heights of SO
5'6 ish.
It doesn't matter what happened to get you to today, beyond shaping your understanding. What really matters is where you go from here.
Re: Heights of SO
I've always dreamed of dating a woman who was significantly taller than me. Sadly, that seems to be just about impossible. The tallest girl I've ever been attracted to in real life (maybe even the tallest girl I've ever met?) was 6'2", which hardly qualifies as taller than me.
Deus ab veritas
Re: Heights of SO
I'm around 5'3" and I've been attracted to guys who were anywhere from a few inches to a foot taller than me. One of my favorite bishops ever is a good 8" shorter than his wife and they're a wonderful couple, so I wouldn't rule out dating a shorter guy. However, according to the data I've been able to find, I'm shorter than 95% of men, so dating shorter men hasn't really been an issue. (In fact, I wonder if the height data I found varies with ethnicity, because I think that the number of men I see on a regular basis who are shorter than I am is much less than 1 in 20.) I think I would have a hard time dating a guy if I outweighed him, though. On the other end of the scale, I'd also have a hard time dating a guy who was much more than a foot taller than I am. At a certain point, guys who are really tall make me feel like a miniature person instead of a real person.
Re: Heights of SO
I think it does. The shortest and skinniest guy I ever (briefly) dated was Asian.Katya wrote:I'm around 5'3" and I've been attracted to guys who were anywhere from a few inches to a foot taller than me. One of my favorite bishops ever is a good 8" shorter than his wife and they're a wonderful couple, so I wouldn't rule out dating a shorter guy. However, according to the data I've been able to find, I'm shorter than 95% of men, so dating shorter men hasn't really been an issue. (In fact, I wonder if the height data I found varies with ethnicity, because I think that the number of men I see on a regular basis who are shorter than I am is much less than 1 in 20.) I think I would have a hard time dating a guy if I outweighed him, though. On the other end of the scale, I'd also have a hard time dating a guy who was much more than a foot taller than I am. At a certain point, guys who are really tall make me feel like a miniature person instead of a real person.
Men from the Mountain West seem to be taller than average (racial makeup? Northern European stock? Well-nourished?). All of the guys I've dated seriously have been 5'10" or taller, without me consciously trying.
Re: Heights of SO
All the guys I have dated have been my height or shorter, and my husband is four inches shorter than me. I feel like I was so picky about personality that height doesn't matter as much to me (also, my husband doesn't SEEM short, if that makes sense?).
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thatonemom
- Posts: 283
- Joined: Fri Feb 17, 2012 12:34 pm
Re: Heights of SO
Most guys I dated were my height or just a bit taller, but I'm 5'8". I can think of a couple dates with shorter guys, and a couple dates with guys who were over 6' but it seems like most guys were in that 5'10"-ish area. My husband included. But even though he's taller than I am, all his height is in his legs and all my height is in my torso. So we're never sitting in pictures because then I tower over him and I feel weird about that.
My younger brother is 6'6" and he loved to date the short girls in high school. I don't think a single one came up to his shoulder. But he ended up marrying a girl that's nearly 6'. I've never asked if he preferred that she's closer to his height.
My younger brother is 6'6" and he loved to date the short girls in high school. I don't think a single one came up to his shoulder. But he ended up marrying a girl that's nearly 6'. I've never asked if he preferred that she's closer to his height.
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Wild Berry
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Re: Heights of SO
I'm w/you Smurf Blue Snuggie. I know I'm kinda shallow about it, but I still much prefer taller guys. I'd like the option to wear high heels and not be taller. I'm around 5'7" which isn't ridiculously tall, but at least a few inches above that like 5'10" minimum is my ideal.
Some guy I barely met recently asked my roommate if I was single and if he had a chance at dating me. He was noticeably shorter than me so she avoided saying that I wasn't interested because he was short. My dad is 6'2" so I definitely feel protected by him when I hug him. I don't have a lot of 'requirements' for looks in a guy, but height is a major priority. I guess it doesn't bugs guys quite as much, but it does bug me.
Some guy I barely met recently asked my roommate if I was single and if he had a chance at dating me. He was noticeably shorter than me so she avoided saying that I wasn't interested because he was short. My dad is 6'2" so I definitely feel protected by him when I hug him. I don't have a lot of 'requirements' for looks in a guy, but height is a major priority. I guess it doesn't bugs guys quite as much, but it does bug me.
- vorpal blade
- Posts: 1750
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- Location: New Jersey
Re: Heights of SO
I used to wonder why short women would want to date tall men. I've heard tall women complain that most of the taller men get taken by shorter women, and it isn't fair. It doesn't leave any men for them. Why can't short women be content with a short guy who is just a little taller? I asked my mother-in-law about it. She is about 4'10" and her husband was about 6'3". She explained that she wanted to marry a tall guy so her children would at least have a chance of being tall.
Re: Heights of SO
Actually, you're taller than over three-fourths of white women, so you are quite tall.Wild Berry wrote:I'm w/you Smurf Blue Snuggie. I know I'm kinda shallow about it, but I still much prefer taller guys. I'd like the option to wear high heels and not be taller. I'm around 5'7" which isn't ridiculously tall, but at least a few inches above that like 5'10" minimum is my ideal.
Some guy I barely met recently asked my roommate if I was single and if he had a chance at dating me. He was noticeably shorter than me so she avoided saying that I wasn't interested because he was short. My dad is 6'2" so I definitely feel protected by him when I hug him. I don't have a lot of 'requirements' for looks in a guy, but height is a major priority. I guess it doesn't bugs guys quite as much, but it does bug me.
- Indefinite Integral
- Posts: 370
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- Location: Not Quite Provo...ish
Re: Heights of SO
I'd also have a really hard time dating a guy who isn't at least a few inches taller than me, but I'm 5'9", so that limits my dating pool quite a bit. In real terms, I'd be ok if the guy was at least 5'9" but my ideal height is more in the 6'2" to 6'4", though I wouldn't be opposed to someone taller than that. I enjoy the feeling of being short and protected, which is hard to get if the guy is shorter than me.
"The pursuit of mathematics is a divine madness of the human spirit." ~ Alfred North Whitehead
Re: Heights of SO
This is funny. Is this a tall girl thing? I don't like feeling short at all. It makes me feel weak, I guess. I always was extremely short growing up, enough to solicit comment, and now that I am of average height (5'4"), I don't need a man to do the protecting for me. A guy's height/weight doesn't reflect on me, but on him and his attractiveness (potentially).
- Indefinite Integral
- Posts: 370
- Joined: Mon Jun 14, 2010 9:57 am
- Location: Not Quite Provo...ish
Re: Heights of SO
Probably.Portia wrote:This is funny. Is this a tall girl thing?
At least for me, feeling short is a rare occurrence so I enjoy when it happens.
"The pursuit of mathematics is a divine madness of the human spirit." ~ Alfred North Whitehead
Re: Heights of SO
LOL. Yeah, short is not a compliment.Indefinite Integral wrote:Probably.Portia wrote:This is funny. Is this a tall girl thing?
At least for me, feeling short is a rare occurrence so I enjoy when it happens.
Re: Heights of SO
The feeling that the extra physical protection that an extra five or six inches of height provides is needed in a twenty-first century first-world Homo sapiens environment seems like a good candidate for being a vestigial evolutionary biological holdover from our great ape antecedents.
Quod gratis asseritur, gratis negatur.
Re: Heights of SO
It seems more cultural to me than biological. I've found the trait to be far more present in girls with a strong religious upbringing than those without; I think teaching that men have a role to protect women would lead to women seeking out men that represent that protection, physically.Digit wrote:The feeling that the extra physical protection that an extra five or six inches of height provides is needed in a twenty-first century first-world Homo sapiens environment seems like a good candidate for being a vestigial evolutionary biological holdover from our great ape antecedents.
Deus ab veritas
Re: Heights of SO
This is awesome. I'm going to see if there are any correlations between politics and height differences between partners.Marduk wrote:It seems more cultural to me than biological. I've found the trait to be far more present in girls with a strong religious upbringing than those without; I think teaching that men have a role to protect women would lead to women seeking out men that represent that protection, physically.Digit wrote:The feeling that the extra physical protection that an extra five or six inches of height provides is needed in a twenty-first century first-world Homo sapiens environment seems like a good candidate for being a vestigial evolutionary biological holdover from our great ape antecedents.
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thatonemom
- Posts: 283
- Joined: Fri Feb 17, 2012 12:34 pm
Re: Heights of SO
I don't think it's really unique to religious culture. It seems to be more of an American cultural norm, that a woman should be the smaller one size-wise. Even in TV shows and movies it's pretty rare to find a couple where the woman is taller or bigger and it's a non-issue.Marduk wrote: It seems more cultural to me than biological. I've found the trait to be far more present in girls with a strong religious upbringing than those without; I think teaching that men have a role to protect women would lead to women seeking out men that represent that protection, physically.